I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
