My hair reeks of homosexuality.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
