Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
