It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
