can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
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