Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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