Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
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