Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
