I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
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