its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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