Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Randomize
