Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
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