on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
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