in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Randomize
