That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
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