yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Randomize