she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
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