Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
