My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
