He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Sex in the backyard? Check.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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