You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
