so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
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