I wish i was in the wii world.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Dignity is for republicans.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Randomize