Your face is a jimmy john
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Girls should come with a carfax report
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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