I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
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