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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
My penis needs a shock collar
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
