We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Randomize