Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
