were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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