Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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