Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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