i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Randomize
