erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
