the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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