I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize
