So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
