ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
