real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Randomize
