We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
