There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Randomize