I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize
