Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize