Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
I think i peed on brittanys purse
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Randomize
