Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
