I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Randomize
