standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
