I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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