we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
