i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Randomize
