I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
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