I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Never underestimate the power of titties
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