He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
NoShamevember. You game?
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
